I hate you. I hate you. The words ran incessantly through his head. I hate you. I hate you. They tortured him over and over. I hate you. I hate you. The scene flashed through his head again, ripping out a little bit of his heart each time it replayed. I hate you. I hate you. Bev’s last whisper haunted him.
        Augur lay curled in a fetal position in the former Resistance HQ. Why, he wondered miserably. Why did it have to all come crashing down like that?
      He hurt. It felt as though one of those shards of ID space had exploded inside of him. Every cell of his body and piece of his soul ached. It had been so perfect. A beautiful, brilliant, rich woman. Cutting edge technology. A chance to do something not even the Taelons had done. A dream come true, or so it had seemed.
        When Harry’s death had led him to Beverly Wu (or was it vise versa?), he had felt the tiniest little tingle of apprehension. But once he got to the base at the South Pole that tingle had fled, leaving only excitement and wonder.
        Working with Bev in the lab, he had felt like a kid on Christmas morning. For just a day he was doing what he had wanted to do his whole life. What he was born to do. Then he’d found out what she was doing and what would happen if she did it. Even then, he’d never even guessed how she really felt…He’d been so stupid. He was painfully reminded of Camelot. "One brief shining moment" was all it had been. But this hadn’t even been real. It had all been a lie.
        Augur could still see her face twisted in revulsion at him, using her final breaths to make sure he knew how much she despised him. Tears ran down his cheeks and he didn’t even bother to wipe them.
        He heard the signal that told him that someone was coming through the security checks and down the tube. He was too depressed to do anything about it. The doors slid open and he heard a familiar footstep.
        "I heard what happened." Lili said simply.
        "Go away." Augur said, not looking up and trying not to let his tears into his voice and failing miserably.
        "No." Lili told him.
        "Get out!" He yelled at her, scrubbing at his face and half-sitting, but still not turning towards her. He couldn’t bear for her to see him this condition, though he’d seen her in worse.
        "No!" Lili yelled back. "You pulled me through when I was addicted to the Bliss and I’ll be damned if I’m going to sit by and let you self-destruct!"
        When Augur didn’t respond, she moved over to the couch and sat down next to him. He didn’t move away. She saw the signs of weeping on his face and realized how much pain he was in.
        "Oh Augur, what did she do to you?" The marine asked, gently wiping away a tear that escaped his control. "What did she do to you?"
        Lili looked into his dark almond eyes and the expression she saw there made her want to cry. She pulled him towards her instinctively and held him. He did not resist. She held him for a time, not saying a word; just rocking him back and forth like his mother had done when he was a child.
        After a long while she let him go. He bit he lip and said quietly. "She hated me."
        Lili was no counselor; she was a soldier, but that meant that her sense of loyalty was higher than almost anyone else. One of her best friends was hurting, and it was her job to do whatever she could. She sighed.
        "Why?" It seemed a good starting place. She hadn’t been there with Augur and Bev, so she wasn’t sure of some of the details, but the main aspects had gotten to her by way of Julia.
Augur jumped up off the couch. "Because I destroyed her dream."
Lili stood. "You destroyed her dream?"
He nodded, wordlessly.
        "Her ‘dream’ would’ve blown up the planet! You saved the world, Augur. How many people can say that?"
He turned away and slumped down on the arm of a chair. Something clicked inside Lili.
        "Oh, I see." She said. "You’re afraid you’re becoming you’re father." Her gaze drilled a hole in his back, but he still refused to look at her.          "Let me tell you something. If you’re father is anything like what little you’ve told me about him, then you could have worse things happen."
Still no response.
        "You’re father was good man. Maybe he took things too far, but you always said that you’re smarter than he was. You won’t make the same mistakes."
Augur turned and looked guiltily at his friend.
        I betrayed her." He told her. "I killed her."
        Lili went over and knelt down in front of him. "Look," She said, taking his hands in hers. "She was using you. It’s not the same. You did what was right. And you did not kill her. She killed herself. It is not your fault. Understand?"
        Augur shook his head. "No. She trusted me with information and I turned around and gave her away."
        "And if you hadn’t?" Lili said, sharply. "Then she’d still be dead, along with six billion other innocent people." She got up. "Besides, she didn’t trust you for a second. You know that. But she did misjudge you."
        Augur hung his head and stared at the floor. "I was such an idiot. She fed me these lines about buying and selling planets and becoming a galactic power and I lapped it up like honey, when all the while she was laughing at me and hating me because I was weak enough to be used that easily."
        "That’s not why she hated you." Lili stated. Things were becoming clearer now.
        "Yes it is. She hated weakness and I was weak. Too weak to take the chance and try something really dangerous."
        "Since when have you been afraid of risk?" Lili asked him. "That’s not it and you know it."
Augur pulled away from her and paced for a moment, like he was trying to get out. He stopped and stood with his back to her.
        "She hated me because she saw that I was just like her. She could see her greed and ruthlessness and selfishness reflected in me, and she hated it. And now I can see it. And I hate it."
        Lili was shocked speechless for a moment. "If that woman weren’t dead, I’d kill her myself." She whispered fiercely. She walked over to him and whirled him around.
        "No!" She said, holding his shoulders in a vise-like grip "You listen to me. She saw something in you, all right. But it wasn’t her. It was what she wished she was."
        Augur looked at Lili dully. "Right." He said, sarcastically.
        Lili decided that at this point there was only one course of action to take. She slapped him. As he put his hand to his face in shock, she dragged him over to the couch and threw him down. He started to protest but she overrode him.
        "Look at me." She demanded, in a military tone that brooked no arguments. She took his chin in both hands and his eyes focused on hers.
        "You are a good man." He started to shake his head but she didn’t let him. "Wu was wrong. Doors is wrong. Maybe you used to be just a greedy, power hungry, self-absorbed man, but you’ve changed. You do care for people. Maybe you still think of yourself first, but if someone is hurting, you’re going to try to help them. Not for a profit, but because they need it. Maybe you can fool everyone else with that mask of ‘I’m only in it for the money’, but you can’t fool me. I know you care.
        "I’ve seen you willing to give your life for someone. The very fact that you went against your nature to tell the Resistance what was going on with Bev proves that you’re not what you think. You are better than you let on.
        "Beverly didn’t hate you because you were weak. She didn’t hate you because you betrayed her or because you killed her. She didn’t even hate you so thoroughly because you destroyed her dream. She didn’t hate you because you were like her. She hated you because you are better. And she knew it. She couldn’t stand the thought that anyone was better than she was. You have the money and the knowledge and the talent and the brains. You’re a strong person, like she was and you’re brilliant. But you have one thing she didn’t. You have a heart, and a good one at that.
        "You’re tough and you don’t want anyone to see how kind you really are. But I can see it. You hide behind your greed, but you can’t hide all the way." Lili put her hand to his cheek and took a deep breath. "You know I’m right Augur. I care about you. I mean that, and you know I don’t lie."
        She moved to the couch next him and put her arm around him.
        "I know you cared for her, and I know it feels horrible to have been used like that and to have to make a decision like you did, but you’re not a bad person. You don’t deserve to be hated."
        Augur met her eyes gratefully. He didn’t say anything, but Lili sensed that he’d heard her and that he was out of danger. It would still be awhile before he was fully healed, she knew, but it would happen. And when he did heal, he’d be a stronger, better person for the experience.
        She kissed him gently on the forehead in a motherly fashion. "You’ll be okay?" She asked, standing up.
        Augur nodded. "Eventually."
        "Time heals all wounds." She said softly. Coming from her it didn’t sound like a cliché.
        Lili started to walk out, but turned in the doorway and paused.
        "I’ll make sure the others stay away from here for a few days, okay?" She said. He nodded. He knew she’d be discreet, too. Lili took one last, long look at him, as though to make sure he’d really be all right, and walked out.
        Augur was left alone once again. He felt a little better. Not much, but a little. The marine Captain had picked up some of the pieces of his heart and put them back together.
        He still hurt. He still felt as though a shard of ID space was stuck inside him. Every cell of his body and bit of his soul still ached. But the horrendous whisper was gone. He no longer saw Bev’s face twisted in hate every time he closed his.
        Instead, a new image came to him. Lili’s kind face looking at him with compassion. Rather, I care about you, I care about you, came her voice, full of sincerity. It soothed him and reassured him. He wasn’t healed yet, not by a long shot, but now he knew he would be. He knew that, eventually, everything would be all right.
        Augur closed his eyes and slept the sleep of the injured, and the image of Lili stayed with him through all of the nightmares and torments that came his way, keeping them at bay.